The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste

[Dont Cry Axl]

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school.
Usually she slept through the class.

One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"

When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.

A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. 'JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep.

Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT FUCKING THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!"

LMFAO

[Mr Fantasy]

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school.
Usually she slept through the class.

One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"

When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.

A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. 'JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep.

Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT FUCKING THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!"

  My friend told me that

There once was a young girl from Dallas
Who used a dynamite stick as a falace
They found her vagina in North Carolina
and her asshole in Buckingham Palace

[Trixi]

There was a young girl named McCall
Whose cunt was exceedingly small,
        But the size of her anus
        Was something quite heinous --
It could hold seven pricks and one ball.

[Dont Cry Axl]

god i love yourr humour :')

[Trixi]

and I love you 


A CS student named Lin
Had a prick the size of a pin
        It was no good for girls
        But just great for squirrels
Who squealed with delight with it in.

[Dont Cry Axl]

 
 

[Trixi]

  My friend told me that

There once was a young girl from Dallas
Who used a dynamite stick as a falace
They found her vagina in North Carolina
and her asshole in Buckingham Palace

A cute friend of hers, Fanny Hill,
Used two dynamite sticks for a dil.
        They found her vagina,
        In South Carolina,
And part of her ass in Brazil.

[Mr Fantasy]

A cute friend of hers, Fanny Hill,
Used two dynamite sticks for a dil.
        They found her vagina,
        In South Carolina,
And part of her ass in Brazil.

Fanny was related to the Duke of York
Who used to eat shit with a fork
Her son said you goon
you eat shit with a spoon
It`s pork that you eat with a fork.

[jplpool]

My mate caught me sniffing his sisters knickers whilst wanking.
Lets just say it's gonna make things awkward at the funeral tomorrow.

[The Second Coming]

My mate caught me sniffing his sisters knickers whilst wanking.
Lets just say it's gonna make things awkward at the funeral tomorrow.

Genius!

A Frenchman walks into a library and asks for a book on war.

The librarian replies, "Fuck off, you'll lose it."

[Dont Cry Axl]

Genius!

A Frenchman walks into a library and asks for a book on war.

The librarian replies, "Fuck off, you'll lose it."

I'm getting annoyed that I dont have any jokes 

[DJ Axl]

Genius!

A Frenchman walks into a library and asks for a book on war.

The librarian replies, "Fuck off, you'll lose it."

 
This is fucking priceless

[DJ Axl]

The new barman in the pub is black, so I said to him, "Beer please, nigger."
He hit the roof and said, "Why don't we swap places, let's see how you like it."
So I went round the bar, he walked out then came back in and said, "Beer please, honkey."

I said, "Sorry mate, we don't serve niggers in here."

 

Holy fucking asscrackers!!

[DJ Axl]

A little girl wrote to Sarah Palin asking, "How did the human race start?". Sarah Palin answered, "God made Adam and Eve, they had children and all mankind was made."

THe next day the little girl wrote to michelle obama and asked the same question. Michelle obama answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys in africa from which the human race evolved."

The confused girl went to her father and asked, "How come Sarah Palin told me that mankind was created by God, and michelle obama told me mankind evolved from monkeys?"

Her father answeres, "Well, it's very simple . . . Sarah Palin told you about her ancestors, and michelle obama told you about hers!"

[Trixi]