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The Second Coming

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The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« on: February 17, 2010, 02:44:24 PM »
As CDF.com seem to be a 2 person forum now, I decided I'd take my little thread over here.

Take this as your home for all your distasteful jokes, images or whatever you want. Just enjoy, and if you're easily offended, then this is not the place for you  :no



Playing Monopoly with my 8 year old daughter last night, I inevitably ended up going to jail.







She was worth it mind.




 :banana
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Zladdi

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #1 on: February 17, 2010, 02:47:47 PM »
it lives
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The Second Coming

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #2 on: February 17, 2010, 02:50:43 PM »
I couldn't come back to this place full time and not take my beloved home of sleeze and offensive material with me.
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Trixi

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #3 on: February 17, 2010, 02:53:25 PM »
Just copy paste all the jokes. I know you're online there :tongue:
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The Second Coming

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #4 on: February 17, 2010, 02:55:45 PM »
:lol: I am too

I'll move some of them over bit by bit fior everyone to enjoy. Such as this:

I found a young homeless girl hidden out by the bins last night. She was dirty and didn't smell too good but underneath the grime i could see she was pretty and had a good body. I brought her inside and gave her a bath. As i was towelling off her naked body i became aroused and one thing led to another. Before i knew it i was making passionate love to her. I was banging her so hard that a couple of times you'd have sworn she was alive.
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Modzilla

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #5 on: February 17, 2010, 03:30:48 PM »
Because it will inevitably come up...

If you're offended, you're not alone, but no one cares.  The thread gives ample warning.  Just ignore it.  It's in Flamers, where it belongs, so instead of posting something stupid, just move along.
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The Second Coming

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #6 on: February 17, 2010, 03:38:54 PM »
Quote from: Modzilla on February 17, 2010, 03:30:48 PM
Because it will inevitably come up...

If you're offended, you're not alone, but no one cares.  The thread gives ample warning.  Just ignore it.  It's in Flamers, where it belongs, so instead of posting something stupid, just move along.

Thank you TRQ, nice to see members with common sense.
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The Spaghetti Incident?

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #7 on: February 17, 2010, 05:27:16 PM »
Quote from: The Second Coming on February 17, 2010, 02:44:24 PM
Playing Monopoly with my 8 year old daughter last night, I inevitably ended up going to jail.







She was worth it mind.




 :banana

 :lol: :bow:
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Sir Francis

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #8 on: February 17, 2010, 07:26:00 PM »
There was a young girl who lived up in the hills of Tennessee. She was about to turn sixteen, and couldn't wait to get her driver's liscense.

She had been subjected to much ribbing from her older brother, telling her that she was too dumb to get her liscense.

When the big day came around, she passed the test with flying colors.

She rushed home and asked her father if she could use the car that night so she and her friend could go in to town where all the cool kids were at.

The father said, "Sure honey, but you'll have to give me a blow-job first."

Wanting to go to town real bad, she agreed.

As she went down on her father, she suddenly jumped up an said "Dad your dick tastes like shit"

Oh yea, her father replied, "I forgot, your brother's got the car tonight."
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Modzilla

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #9 on: February 17, 2010, 08:52:14 PM »
Quote from: The Second Coming on February 17, 2010, 03:38:54 PM
Thank you TRQ, nice to see members with common sense.

:disgust: :shy: :tongue:

You're welcome =).
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The Second Coming

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #10 on: February 17, 2010, 09:31:16 PM »
Quote from: The Spaghetti Incident? on February 17, 2010, 05:27:16 PM
:lol: :bow:

I was hoping you had a good sense of humour. I got the feelings MODs might come down hard on this kind of thread.






I delivered a baby yesterday.



The parents' face when it dropped through the letter box was priceless. Maybe next time they'll pay the fucking ransom.






BTW, I'm testing a new font that only paedophiles can read.

How's it working so far?
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Euterpe

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #11 on: February 17, 2010, 09:34:39 PM »
Quote from: Murph on February 17, 2010, 07:26:00 PM
There was a young girl who lived up in the hills of Tennessee. She was about to turn sixteen, and couldn't wait to get her driver's liscense.

She had been subjected to much ribbing from her older brother, telling her that she was too dumb to get her liscense.

When the big day came around, she passed the test with flying colors.

She rushed home and asked her father if she could use the car that night so she and her friend could go in to town where all the cool kids were at.

The father said, "Sure honey, but you'll have to give me a blow-job first."

Wanting to go to town real bad, she agreed.

As she went down on her father, she suddenly jumped up an said "Dad your dick tastes like shit"

Oh yea, her father replied, "I forgot, your brother's got the car tonight."

 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Sir Francis

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #12 on: February 17, 2010, 09:40:45 PM »
This guy goes to a super market and goes to isle 12 and asks for a box of condoms.

The lady askes "what size" and the guy says "I don't know" so the lady askes him to pull down his pants.

The lady tugs a few times and says "you need a box of x-large condoms".

So this guy hears behind him and he asks for a box of condom's, and the lady says "what size" and the guy says I don't know.

So the lady asks him to pull down his pants.

The lady tugs a few time and says "get a box of medium condoms"

So this teenager in isle 11 hears and wants some of the action.

So he goes to isle 12 and asks "can I have a box of condoms"

The lady asks "what size" and the teenage says "I don't know"

So the lady asks him to pull down his pants .

When he does, the lady tugs a few times, stands up and announces "Clean up in isle 12"
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The Second Coming

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #13 on: February 17, 2010, 10:28:09 PM »
:lol:


Red roses - check!
Barry White album - check!
Scented candles - check!

Tonight, that little hot minx of a wank sock won't know what's hit it.
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Sir Francis

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Re: The Second Coming's Thread of Distaste
« Reply #14 on: February 17, 2010, 10:30:50 PM »
An armless man in a long jacket walks into a bathroom and stands by a urinal...

Soon seeing he needs help to use the toilet he asks a closeby man, " Can you help me point my penis" ?

The man reluctantly accepted but, decided not to look at the mans penis. After a few seconds of holding it he thinks, " Hey! I'm grabbing it right"? " So I should look, I have a right"!

He looks down at the mans member and sees that is beyond hidious. Startled he jumps back and lets go, asking. " What the hell is wrong with it ?"

The "armless" man pulls his arms out of his jacket and says "I dunno, but, I ain't touchin' it." and walks away.
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